A tear drop by your side

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When you leave us yet again,
What will you leave behind?
Have you writ your thoughts and fears
For us to see, to give us hope
That you aren’t just what you appear,
Ambition crushed by single tear
Which at your side was cried
As you lay and died,
Left this world,
Left me yet again.
From what I see around,
You never did care,
You just left everything bare,
So that when you left for good,
You were easy to forget,
It’s so sad,
You silly fool,
I can’t forget you,
But how can I show people that they can remember you too?
If there is nothing to show,
You scary, old bastard, you,
So many times I wish I had told you
Or hit you
Like you hit me.
But in the end,
There are so many good things,
And none of them will be left,
Except that single tear that once cried,
drops by your side
As you drop from this world
Rather than rise,
You silly fool,
You scary, old bastard, you,
You will be missed,
You won’t be forgotten,
But listen to me talk as though you are already dead,
Because I have never known you able to raise your head
Above the bottle
And realise that somewhere in there,
That person you are suppressing,
Who occasionally gets out,
When the sun shines or the bright stars flicker in the sky
Could have been there always,
With us,
With me,
It’s a shame,
And I know you regret it,
And none of us will learn to forget it
Unfortunately.
It’s just a shame,
A shame is all,
That you have killed your life and soul
And haven’t tried to get it back,
Given up,
You silly sap.

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