Film Review: Aaaaaaaaah!

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Monkey Business 

AAAAAAAAH_ONESHEET_web-thumb-630xauto-54176

Note: An ape translation of this review is available. Were it not for an ingenious comic conceit, Steve Oram’s highly original comic melodrama would be a familiar story. A man splits from his wife, meets a woman at a party, trapped in an unhappy relationship, and the two decided to make a run for it […]

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Film Review: Turbo Kid

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Retro-spectacle 

Turbo Kid

Ooh Trayers will long memories will recognise the name Jason Eisener on the credits of François Simard, Anouk Whissell, and Yoann-Karl Whissell (yes, three directors), post-apocalyptic ‘80s throwback. Like Eisener’s Hobo with a Shotgun, Turbo Kid is a conscious bolt-on to a canon of low-budget exploitation movies, made when belts were tight but concepts high. […]

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Film Review: Cherry Tree

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Witches Familiar 

Cherry-Tree-Movie-Poster-David-Keating

2015’s London FrightFest opened with this derivative lump of schlock-mush from David Keating, a movie that answers the question you’ve always wanted answered, namely, why aren’t there more Irish and Dutch co-productions? Perhaps because when funding bodies in both countries stump up, pun intended, they get culturally nonspecific gunk like this – commercial margarine for […]

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Film Review: Turbo Kid

Posted on:

Retro-spectacle 

Turbo Kid

Ooh Trayers will long memories will recognise the name Jason Eisener on the credits of François Simard, Anouk Whissell, and Yoann-Karl Whissell (yes, three directors), post-apocalyptic ‘80s throwback. Like Eisener’s Hobo with a Shotgun, Turbo Kid is a conscious bolt-on to a canon of low-budget exploitation movies, made when belts were tight but concepts high. […]

> > Read More...

Film Review: Cherry Tree

Posted on:

Witches Familiar 

Cherry-Tree-Movie-Poster-David-Keating

2015’s London FrightFest opened with this derivative lump of schlock-mush from David Keating, a movie that answers the question you’ve always wanted answered, namely, why aren’t there more Irish and Dutch co-productions? Perhaps because when funding bodies in both countries stump up, pun intended, they get culturally nonspecific gunk like this – commercial margarine for […]

> > Read More...

Film Review: The Gift

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Old School Thrills

The Gift

Foremost in the movie marketing arsenal is the humble trailer – once a clumsily assembled batch of clips linked by a baritone voiceover, now a meticulously edited, carefully scored preview of riches to come. Trailer makers are there to polish up the film’s best shots and one liners and fool your brain into becoming aroused. […]

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Film Review: Fantastic Four

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Tranks a Million 

F4

It’s been three years since Josh Trank caught Hollywood’s attention with Chronicle, effectively a superhero blockbuster with a found footage gimmick, delivered for a cool $12m. When you can orchestrate thrills and handle complexed visual effects on that budget, the suits responsible for tentpole franchises stir in their hot tubs, send away their hookers and […]

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Film Review: Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation

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Syndicated Action 

MI5

Warning: This review discusses the film’s ending. Late in Christopher McQuarrie’s old fashioned counter espionage thriller, Jeremy Renner, the man introduced to the series to replace a fading Tom Cruise, only to be kept in his box by that sequel’s success and the reminder that its star will risk life and limb for our cheap […]

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Film Review: Pixels

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Nostalgiarrrgggghhhhhhhhh

Pixels

Critics are cruel to Adam Sandler but are they wrong to single him out? Sure, he’s the antithesis of an artist, unashamedly nepotistic and cynical; a peddler of beer and pizza cinema, happy to vomit up misogyny and scatology as a substitute for wit; an infantile occupant of screen space, content to bolt together low […]

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Film Review: Ant-Man

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Small World

AM

Marvel’s astute handling of Ant-Man’s production ensured the movie opened with confidence sky high in the finished product. The studio allowed the mercurial Edgar Wright and Joe Cornish, filmsmiths with excellent genre pedigrees, to develop the movie for the better part of a decade, then ditched them at the 11th hour. This shrewd piece of […]

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Film Review: Terminator Genisys

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Obsolete 

TG

Warning: This review reveals the plot twist already ruined by the movie’s poor marketing. In one of many heartbreaking scenes in Terminator Genisys; that’s pump smashing for fans, not emotionally affecting; Emilia Clarke’s Sarah Connor tells Jai Courtney’s voided Kyle Reese, “that movie you love? The classic? It’s gone.” I’m paraphrasing but the audience are […]

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Film Review: Jurassic World

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Trevorrowland 

JW

The problem with nostalgia is that it makes us forget the way things really were. Case in point, Jurassic Park – the 1993 blockbuster that wowed audiences with its photorealistic dinosaurs and left a deep footprint in popular culture. Spielberg’s mind was elsewhere of course, he already had a foot in the holocaust, and consequently […]

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